Saturday, March 1, 2014

The 8 Reasons I’d Love To Be An Undateable Girl

People b*tch and complain about being single, stressing how much they hate it and how it’s such a drag to go through life alone. You know what’s a drag? Having to tell someone what you plan on doing all day long. Here my personal explanation

1) I'd rather stay in than go outtumblr_m2f2usBRNY1qbalato1_500
When the weather is less than ideal, the most enticing place to spend Friday night is most definitely my bed, not the bar.

2) If I do go out, I’m not remembering the majority of it.
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No one wants to date a girl who blacks out every time she goes out, do they? Although, guys, at least we don’t judge you when you end your night the same way!

3) I love my best friend more than I can foresee myself loving a potential partner.
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You already love your best friends and trust her whole heartedly. She basically fulfills every need you could ever want in a boyfriend.

4) I have a low tolerance for bullsh*t.
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Relationships are all about understanding, patience and compromise: three things I have absolutely no interest in pursuing.

5) I have trust issues.
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Seamless said my food would arrive in 30 minutes; it has now been 46 minutes! How am I expected to trust a person when so many other things in life let me down?!

6) My afterwork schedule doesn’t allow for a relationship.
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Wake up, go to school, cheers practice, eat dinner, shower and go to sleep. I’m not really sure where a boyfriend would fit into this rigorous schedule

7)  I’d rather cuddle a pint of ice cream than a man.
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At least this delicious snack won’t judge me for being myself!

8) I’m too picky.
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He’s too short; he has too many feelings. Why does he text me all day? Why didn’t he text me all day? Blah, blah, blah. We need one of those machines where we can input exactly which qualities and traits we’d like in our dream guy, and then he magically pops out and we live happily ever after. Don't dream too much. Impossible.



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